mountainsandmochas:

one of my favorite ron swanson lines

radsanta:

radsanta:

a cute boy randomly started texting me and is being rly nice to me?//????

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I HATE BOYS

dutchster:

isn’t it weird how hair on your head is (usually) attractive but when it’s on the ground it’s gross

the “text me when you get home so i know you’re safe” kind of people are the kind of people i wanna be around

didihearthereadyset:

didihearthereadyset:

didihearthereadyset:

didihearthereadyset:

I have a really hot waiter.

Guys he came back with my food and said, “Careful the plate is hot too.” So I asked, “too?” and hE TOUCHED MY SHOULDER THEN MADE A SIZZLING NOISE.
IM FREAKING OUT WHAT DO I DO.

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wanna know what these all say?

"suck his dick"

marthemacabre:

heithel:

fannibleh:

uobyugit:

not my family bitch

why am i crying

“Stay away of my territory”

THERE’S THE BANANA GUY

marthemacabre:

heithel:

fannibleh:

uobyugit:

not my family bitch

why am i crying

“Stay away of my territory”

THERE’S THE BANANA GUY

leviathans-in-the-tardis:

you don’t realise how much tumblr has changed your view on things until you spend time with friends who don’t have tumblr and they say something and you’re just like

oh

nakedly:

just reminding everyone i have an ask box

evilnerdproductions:

“You would look so much better if you lost some weight-“

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“You would be so much cuter with make up-“

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“Make sure you shave or wax way all that body hair-“

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“You shouldn’t wear that-“

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“You would be beautiful if you just changed how you look-“

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sammy-got-pimped-for-pie:

In honor of back-to-school.

sammy-got-pimped-for-pie:

In honor of back-to-school.